Отрывок из приключений Кота, капитана и двух коров рыжего цвета.


Для меня оказалось странным, что ни кассир, ни водитель не могли связать двух слов для того, чтобы сесть верхом на облезлого верблюда и двигаться дальше. «В конце концов, — подумал Кот — я же могу себе это позволить – быль самим собой», – и он, громко мяукнув, царапнул мясника за лысину. Даже кони в этот момент вздрогнули – так громко завопил мясник. «Деликатес!!!», — так он закричал и погнался за котом, который, задрав хвост, быстро умчался прочь, довольный своей выходкой. «Это же надо было так вляпаться», – думал мясник, вытирая с лысины кровь и норовя ущипнуть за рога свежую корову. «Еще только год назад я был здоров и весел, а уже сейчас лыс и никому не гож», – с горечью думал он. «Что будет лет через десять? Наверное, я совсем состарюсь и умру», – и мясник горько и громко заплакал, а лошади в своих стойлах заржали испуганно ещё громче.

Кот ничего этого, естественно не знал, и не спеша шёл по своим делам дальше. «Какой великолепный день выдался», – думал он. «С новыми силами, как вчера помню, подошёл к машине – и нате пожалуйста, подвернулся же этот мясник. Что ему надо было, интересно?..» «Долго же он вас атаковывал, господин Кот», – неожиданно произнесла сорока, сидевшая сверху на ветке старой рябины. «Я привлёк его внимание», – гордо и важно произнес рыжий, ни на секунду не смутившись. «Да я знаю, знаю», – чирикнула сорока, тут же превратившись в воробья. «До новых встреч в эфире», – тот шмыгнул в открытую за ним форточку и исчез, словно утренний сон на берегу моря.
Так повеяло холодком, что Кот не на шутку растерялся. Виданное ли дело, с утра так воблой объесться – Кот лениво замурчал и прыгнул в водоём, за пределами которого находилось то самое лениво плескавшееся море, в котором исчезали сны. Я бы плавал так целую вечность – сказал Кот, и, не раздумывая, бросился сверху на катер, летевший рядом с ним. Люди немного переполошились, но, увидев добрые намерения Кота, заново затвердели и снова стали статуями. «Да знаю я их всех», — лениво протянул Кот и, неуклюже усевшись баронессе на хвост, принялся щеголять новым кафелем. «Тут давно что-то ничего не слышно», – сказал бубновый валет, и из-за угла вновь потянуло смородиной. «Как знать, как знать», – отозвалась семидесятипятилетняя старушонка в синей рубашке с воротником навыпуск. «Я была тут молодая», — подвела итоги она, и, как резюме, бросила стакан в воду. «Славное было время», – подтвердил Кот, и изо всех сил вцепился старушке в её густые кудри. «Знатно, знатно, дорогой», – восхищалась та его работой. За этим всем пристально наблюдал из-за трубы водопровода сантехник дядя Петя, а с ним его дочь Клава и подвыпивший вечно небритый сосед Колька. «Да, за просто так тут не отделаешься», – ужаснувшись, выдохнул тот и снова налил портвейна. «Долго пить будем?» – сурово спросил подошедший капитан, он же электромонтёр по образованию. Главным занятием в своей жизни он считал кухню, но никак не мог настроиться на нужную волну, и всякий раз оказывался то в Африке, то в Англии, то вообще в Австралии или в новой Зеландии, что с японского означало – «кёху» (с ударением на первый слог). Дословно это переводилось как «произвольное перемещение предметов и существ мужского пола в пространстве», но капитан не был твёрдо уверен, что он мужчина, к тому же ему казалось, что он немного путешествовал во времени – по крайней мере, во времена Колумба его звали иначе, и это имя носило явно религиозный характер. «Что же меня так волнует?..» – никак не мог понять он, и, до боли в пальцах, сжимал свой старый сюртук, подаренный ему ещё его прабабушкой, наверняка помнявшей Наполеона.
Смеркалось. На воде начали появляться пузыри, и капитан с его новой командой дружно решили идти на дно. «Ещё не было дня или ночи, чтобы они не тонули», – авторитетно заявил Кот, и нового дня больше никто не ожидал. Снова предстояло непонятное приключение, снова впереди маячил рассвет, и дальняя дорога стала чуть ближе и чуть приятнее. «Так-то лучше», – удовлетворённо подумал Кот и улёгся спать у ног своей хозяйки — старого капитана, по вечерам подрабатывающей мясником.
25.10.15


Отрывок из приключений Кота, капитана и двух коров рыжего цвета.: 221 комментарий

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  111. Existen otras causas de disfunción eréctil, entre ellas, traumas en la región pélvica, quimioterapia, radioterapia en la región pélvica, cirugías contra el cáncer de próstata, cirugías en la región pélvica y andar en bicicleta por demasiado tiempo (ciclistas profesionales). La eyaculación prematura es la incapacidad de mantener la erección el tiempo suficiente para conseguir la satisfacción mutua.

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